FART FANTASY

Tuesday, June 21, 2011

I saw the worst fidgeting I've ever seen last night, 23 August 1996.


I saw the worst fidgeting I've ever seen last night, 23 August 1996.

Concentration wasn't involved, but she was evidently past bursting, indeed
I think she ought to have wet herself already by rights! I was in a convenience
store late at night (having been playing Badminton) and saw a 16 or 17 year old
girl in the queue in front of me behaving most strangely - I soon deduced that
she was fidgeting. 

The girl was wearing an ankle-length grey skirt, with a blue denim-like shirt,
and had chestnutty-brown hair.  She was standing very tight-legged, holding her
upper-thighs close together.  Every few seconds, she would bend at the hips
left or right, or even forward over the counter, lunging as though her life
depended on it.  I suppose it may have done in her eyes, since she was with
another blonde girl who had rushed from choosing a snack to the counter, dumped
the food down and left the subject to pay - I think the blonde was just as
desperate and couldn't contemplate the thought of standing still to pay.  The
first one laughed as the blonde rushed off, which reinforced my opinion.  As I
left the store quickly, they walked away laughing with two boys, but I still
believe they were bursting - I have never seen such blatant fidgeting.  And it
was a new type of fidgeting for me, too - I honestly thought she was dancing
for a moment!

I had been stopped by a Policeman on my way to the store, who was stopping all
traffic making enquiries about an armed robbery (yes, seriously, in quiet Devon)
- if it weren't for that Policeman, I wouldn't have still been in the shop when
she walked in... there are some real opportunities in life which never present
themselves, I'm sure.

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